问HN：年轻孩子的父母们，你们是如何教导孩子打人是不被接受的？
我们五岁的孩子在感到沮丧时有时会打人——通常是在他感到不知所措、被忽视或被迫做他不想做的事情时。在家里，我们一直在帮助他识别自己的情绪、在反应之前暂停一下，以及在犯错后进行修复。
真正的挑战在学校。当他打人或推人（即使是轻微的）时，后果是立竿见影且严重的——被请出课堂、停课等等。虽然我理解安全和界限的重要性，但这些反应往往似乎并没有帮助他更好地调节情绪。事实上，有时这些反应会通过增加他的焦虑和强化被排斥的感觉使情况变得更糟。
我们正在努力与学校合作，但在发展适宜性和学校行为模型之间找到一致性很困难。
我希望能找到一些实用有效的策略，尤其是那些能够培养同理心或帮助自我调节的方法。
非常希望听到其他家长、教育工作者或经历过类似情况的人的分享。
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Our 5-year-old sometimes hits when he’s frustrated—usually in situations where he feels overwhelmed, ignored, or forced into something he doesn’t want to do. At home, we’ve been working on helping him name his feelings, pause before reacting, and repair after a mistake.<p>The real challenge is at school. When he hits or pushes (even mildly), the consequences are immediate and severe—being removed from class, suspension, etc. While I understand the need for safety and boundaries, these responses often don’t seem to help him learn better regulation. In fact, they sometimes make things worse by increasing his anxiety and reinforcing feelings of exclusion.<p>We’re trying to partner with the school, but it’s hard to find alignment between what’s developmentally appropriate and what fits the school’s behavioral model.<p>I’m looking for practical, effective strategies that have worked for you—especially things that build empathy or help with self-regulation.<p>Would love to hear from other parents, educators, or folks who’ve been through this.